Thursday, June 30, 2011

Day 70: Take our test and find out if you're a PSYCOPATH


Day 70
Today, I have to find out if I’m a psychopath.
I start my day very badly. I find a bug in the kitchen and it freaks me out.
Then I think one got into my cereal and I ate it (there wasn’t one) and I’m just kind of terrified of my kitchen now.
But work is okay. It goes by pretty quickly, that’s good.
I go to the store after work, and it’s only now that I get to take the test in the book.
I’ll put my results here.
It’s a list of qualities, scoring 0 if I never have them, 1 if sometimes, 4 if all the time.
Glibness/superficial charm: 4. It’s kind of my job to be polite and charming.
Grandiose sense of self-worth: 0.
Tendency for boredom/need for stimulation: 4.
Pathological lying: 0.
Cunning/manipulative behavior: 1. But everyone is manipulative at times, right?
Lack of remorse: 1.
Shallow affect (monotone voice, blank expression): 1. seriously, I work in fast food. If I didn’t sometimes zone out I would be insane.
Lack of empathy: 1.
Parasitic lifestyle: 0.
Poor behavioral control: 0.
Promiscuous sexual behavior: 0.
Behavioral problems early in life: 0. I think.
Lack of realistic long-term plans: 1. I honestly believe I’ll be a successful author. I don’t have any other plans for my life.
Impulsiveness: 1.
Irresponsible behavior: 1.
Failure to accept the consequences of actions: 1. I’d like to say 0, but I’m being honest here.
Many marital relationships: 0.
Juvenile delinquency: 0.
Callousness: 1. I like to call it sarcasm, though.
Criminal versatility: 0.
My total score is 16. Since I’m supposed to turn myself into the police only if my score’s above 40, I think it is safe to say I am not a psychopath.
Yay!


--

Late, I know, sorry.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Day 69: Downsizing Day


Day 69
Today, I have to fire someone from my ‘entourage’. It’ll save me money, apparently.
I can’t think of a single person in my life I want to get rid of.
I guess I’d save the most money firing Mike, considering I spend so much time talking to him and so much gas going to see him (and he does the same), but I’m not going to do that.
What I end up firing is actually a thing. My electric razor.
It’s broken twice, and both times I’ve had to buy a $20 replacement. But when it breaks this morning, I say screw it and just use a regular razor.
I have no idea what I’m doing, but somehow the hair comes off my legs and I don’t cut myself.
I go to Julia’s graduation party today. I don’t know most of the people there, but it’s fun to hang out anyways.
Until my period randomly starts again, that sucks.
But then I come home after the party and watch TV and all’s good.
Some guy IMs me as I’m randomly surfing the internet. Apparently he found me on this Facebook application, Are You Interested, and yeah, he’s interested in me.
I’m a little bit flattered, but also a little creeped out. My Facebook profile picture is terrible, and there’s no way anyone could find me attractive from that.
I just tell this guy I have a boyfriend, and he stops talking to me. This is an awesome feeling. I’m finally that girl that’s being hit on and is totally unavailable because I am just so devoted to my boyfriend. I feel so wanted and it’s a good feeling.
I should change my profile on that to say I have a boyfriend. I’m gonna do that now.
While surfing the internet, I find a picture of some girls wearing dresses that make them look like Daleks from Doctor Who. The dresses are pretty cute, and seem easy to remake for myself. And since Mike has an awesome Doctor costume, all we’d need is a place to go.
I find a sci-fi/geek convention really close to Amherst at the end of summer. We’re going to that, then.
I’m not telling Mike what the costume is. I want to surprise him. The girls in the picture are getting all sorts of comments on how hot they are, and even though I don’t have the same body type as them, I only want Mike to think I’m hot. Everyone else, I just want them to think I’m creative.


--

Two things that happened after this day.
1. A lot more guys started hitting on me. Not just online, offline. It's not a huge amount, but more than I was getting before I met Mike.
I don't get why.
2. The Dalek costume turned out AWESOME.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Day 68: Let your hair grow


Day 68
Today, all I need to do is choose one hair on my body to grow out to a yard long.
I choose the hair on my head.
I hate getting up early. I just want to fall back asleep.
Work is long and busy. My feet hurt and I cannot wait to get home.
But then I’m told I can leave an hour early. This is great news. Plus, as I’m leaving, I get my paycheck!
Now I’m just relaxing and I’m so happy I have a day off tomorrow. I get to sleep in!
My biggest accomplishment for the day is making a fantastic topping for ice cream.
Seriously, though. I found out that the Hershey’s Syrup we have has gone bad, so I decided, hey we’ve got Hershey’s bars, it’s basically the same, right? So I melt some and drizzle it over the ice cream.
No, it’s better. It’s chocolatier, and it hardens on the ice cream, creating this nice little shell. So yummy.
(That was free advertising, Hershey Corporation. Please send me free candy now.)


--

why don't I remember this day?
Oh also I failed at growing my hair out to one yard. I later cut it.
I actually love my hair short now.

Monday, June 27, 2011

Day 67: Detox Day


Day 67
Today, I’m supposed to detox my body.
Really, I’m supposed to eat nothing, but since I have 8 hours of work, not going to happen.
So I decide to try an actual diet for today. I will cut out grease.
For breakfast, I have a muffin and some fruit. This morning is actually pretty relaxing, despite it being 5 am, because the house is silent. No one’s home, so no one’s rushing me out the door saying that I’ll be late.
I am late leaving the house, but I get to work on time.
Work is long and terrible. There’s really nothing healthy at McDonald’s, but I manage with water and apples. I do break and have a sausage biscuit, but hey, I’m on my period. I really need that iron.
The day just keeps getting longer, and I’m pretty much dead from cramps. I’m handling things mostly on my own because the only other one at the registers is going through training. It’s hard.
But I finally get home, and I break today’s task again by having a delicious chocolate pudding. Yay pudding.
Hey, with my period, chocolate should always be allowed.
I make myself a dinner of grilled chicken and some fruit salad. (Okay, I didn’t make the fruit salad, that was leftovers. But I did make the chicken.)
The chicken overcooks a bit, but it makes this nice hard crust that I then season with garlic-infused sea salt and black pepper.
And it’s delicious.
I wonder why I don’t cook more often. I used to love to cook, and I still do, really, but I never feel like I have time.
I’ve been doing more baking now, but somehow, it’s not as satisfying. Mix ingredients, stick in oven, ta-da. I still love it, just not as much as actual cooking.
Anyways. The dinner is good, and when I go to bed tonight, I actually manage to fall asleep without a problem. That probably has more to do with the sleeping pill I took rather than how my luck for the day has been going, but whatever.


--

I got less than 6 hours of sleep last night. I don't have any year later thoughts. just read that part up there.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Day 66: Today save water.


Day 66
Today, I’m supposed to conserve water.
The book basically suggests not flushing after using the bathroom, but I conserve in other ways. I don’t drink any water, and I’m sparse on washing my hands (but not at work, of course. I handle food, sanitation is good).
I work 9 hours today. So when I get home, I am exhausted.
I’m alone when I get home. Dad left, and so I have the house to myself for a week. Too bad I’ll be working for so much of it.
My day’s boring, really. So I’m alone, but I don’t do anything but watch TV.

--

Isn't it weird that I do not remember this day at all?
It was only a year ago, I wrote about it, and it's gone from my memory. I even forgot that my parents left me alone for a week.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Day 65: Today learn a poem by heart


Day 65
Today, all I have to do is memorize a poem. Not hard.
I memorize it in 5 minutes. It’s a short poem.
I make plans to meet with friends later in the day, then I head out to do some shopping on my own.
I buy some awesome stuff, have fun driving around.
At one store, I think I’ve lost my wallet, but after a moment of freaking out, I find it in my car. I’m very relieved.
I get home, then go out again when Lanie texts. We go to the mall where I just was a few hours earlier.
We have a lot of fun, but then when I come home I realize there’s a problem—I’m running low on money. I owe my parents $50 and I’m supposed to put some of my money in savings, but then when I do I won’t have enough for food and gas for the next few days.
Oh crap.
I’m trying to be good about money. But I’m new to budgeting. This is hard.
Everything I bought was on sale, but so many sales just add up to still spending a lot of money.
I’m hoping my parents will bail me out, or at least wait on collecting the money I owe them.

--
um...I'm still not better with budgeting. I wish I was, but it's hard.
also I've forgotten the poem.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Day 64: Today send a letter


Day 64
Today, I have to send a photo of myself and a $5 bill to someone at random, no return address or explanation.
I ‘randomly’ chose to send it to a Daniel Fenton in Indiana.
Okay, so my old Danny Phantom obsession hasn’t completely gone away. It’s sad that I still remember that my friends and I had figured out that Danny lived in Indiana.
The rest of my plans for today are simple. I’m going to go to see Toy Story 3 with my dad. Also I’m going to buy some new jeans because sadly, mine have worn through and now have holes on the inner thigh.
I need more than one pair of jeans at a time, really.
I get a picture and a $5 bill and I’m going to send the letter, but my dad stops me. He wants to send it from a different city, so he’s taking it with him when he goes out to San Francisco with my mom so that a stalker won’t trace it back to Westford. Technically, my part’s done here.
I go out with my dad later in the day. I get my new jeans, and I’m happy with them.
Then, we go to see Toy Story 3. It’s really a great movie. It made me feel like a little kid again, but it didn’t seem like a “kid’s movie”. It seemed like it wasn’t for kids, it was for those of us who actually grew up with Woody and Buzz.
Also now that I’m home, I’m going to go hug my teddy bear and promise him that I’ll never abandon him. My kids will be playing with him.


--

A year ago was the only time I've seen Toy Story 3.
Like everyone else my age, it touched me and made me cry. It was seeing what happened to my childhood friends and really caring about their fate.
why haven't I seen it again since? I don't know. I should get the DVD.

also, I wonder what happened to that photo and $5? anyone know a Daniel Fenton in Indiana who got this in the mail?

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Day 63: Break A World Record


Day 63
Today, I’m supposed to break a world record.
I do this very simply: I proclaim myself the awesomest person to have ever lived. I even write it down to make it official.
I suppose it worked, because my day doesn’t suck.
Work is dead. Really, our lunch rush is maybe 6 people at a time. It’s so slow.
But I’m okay with that. I’m literally getting paid to do nothing. I’m watching TV, talking to the new kid, and it’s good. I like this.
The last hour kind of sucks, because I have a few terrible customers. There’s one lady who assumes that no one speaks English but me—because I’m white.
Then there was this bitch (I wouldn’t normally just call someone that, but that’s what she is) who gave me a $5 bill to pay for a $2 item, then accused me of short-changing her. She of course gave me $20.
She had the manager on duty count out the drawer to make sure she was right. I was supposed to leave then, but I had to stay for another 15 minutes taking care of other customers while he counted the drawer.
Of course she was nearby me this whole time, talking to her friend and calling me a "stupid little girl". She kept saying she was hoping I was being careful with other people's change.
The drawer ended up being completely right of course. She said that I must have made so many other mistakes it had evened out and she still needed her $15.
Then she said she would be calling the manager and I should be fired.
I don’t think I’ll be fired, of course. I did nothing wrong, the manager even told me so. So ha, bitch.
When I get home, I’m pretty much immediately rushed out to go with my dad to take my mom to the airport. She’s going to San Francisco for a conference for her work, and my dad will be joining her in a few days.
After we drop Mom off, Dad and I go to Sonic for dinner. I don’t really like this restaurant, but my dad does, and it is Father’s Day.
The food is okay, the restaurant itself is just terrible. I don’t like sitting in the car to eat—the car is not comfortable.
But then we get home and I can finally relax in front of the TV. I don’t have to get up tomorrow. This is good.
I talk to Mike online, and he wants to see me. So I send him a picture text, and that’s not good enough for him, he wants me to turn on my webcam.
I have a gigantic zit, I haven’t washed my hair in a few days, I really don’t want my boyfriend to see me like this. I try telling him that, and he insists he doesn’t care and that I should let him see me anyways.
Yeah, I start crying a bit (with the webcam off). I don’t want him upset with me, but I really don’t want to be seen.
Ironically, when I finally do give in with the webcam, his computer apparently isn’t working and he can’t see me.
So yeah, that was a lot of crying for nothing.
But I do feel better after a little while.

--
I'm dead tired. I think, from rereading this post, this was about the time last year too that I burned out.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011


Day 62
Today, I have to prepare circles everywhere I go.
I don’t really do this, because it’s impossible. I draw circles with my foot where I can, but they often don’t last as I’m drawing them on hard ground. Only two stick—in the bathroom rug in front of the sink, and the one at work. That one was drawn with grease.
My day doesn’t completely suck. It’s long and busy, but I manage.
Because I have not much to say, I’m just going to go into a rant about McDonald’s.
My job is not to be your slave, people. My job is to help you get food and help McDonald’s get money. I will be polite to you, I may even be a nice friendly person.
But if you’re demanding, I’m going to silently hate you. Deal with it. I won’t spit in your food, I won’t overcharge you, the most I’ll do is stop smiling and roll my eyes at you.
Old people, I’ll forgive you because I know you’re just cranky from being old.
Little kids, I’ll forgive you because you’re just adorable.
But you jerkasses in your midlife crises and you douchey teenage boys trying to flirt with me or make fun of me (or maybe it’s the same thing for you, I can’t understand the boy mind), I will hate you. Be polite and just tell me what you want, then leave.
Bitchy ladies who are clearly sick of your kids, I may not even be polite to you. You’re the worst. If I need you to repeat something because I couldn’t hear you over the screaming baby, shut the kid up before being all nasty at me.
If you have a heavy accent, I may not understand you. This doesn’t mean I’m racist. It just means it’s noisy behind the counter and you’re not speaking quite clearly. Same goes for old people who are quiet.
If the kitchen messes up your food, don’t yell at me. I’m going to have them remake it, no charge to you. But seriously, you have the receipt in your hand telling you I put in the order right. Just simply ask for a redo and you’ll be fine, there’s no need for bitching at me.
I’m required to ask you if you want a frappe. I’m required to ask you if it’s for here or to go. I’m required to ask you if you need sauce or ketchup or whatever. Don’t be all snide about it. Don’t roll your eyes and say a drawn out “noooooo”. I can’t read your mind. I’m awesome, but not that awesome.
Okay. I feel better now.

--
There's a theory I've heard that everyone should have to work food service and/or retail once in their lives.
I absolutely agree with this.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011


Day 61
Today, I have to find out how symmetrical I am.
I’ll measure my symmetry after work. It’s 5 am, I’m too tired to do that yet.
Work kind of sucks at the beginning, but really only because it’s so early and busy. I amuse myself by watching TV.
The World Cup is on. I am not into sports at all, but somehow this game is sucking me in. It’s US vs Slovenia, and it’s a good game. Everyone in the restaurant is hooked on this game, constantly checking the scores and cheering every time the US makes a goal. We only tie, but what little I know about this event, I think that’s a good thing.
Towards the end of my day, a new kid shows up. He’s only 15, he’s so tiny. Plus, it’s nice not being the new one anymore. Now I have experience, I’m not being constantly coached.
When I leave, I learn one of the managers, one of the ones I actually like, is leaving. I’m sad.
I measure my face to check my symmetry. The instructions for this are ridiculous, but pretty straightforward.
Of course, I measure in inches, and I probably need to use centimeters.
I’m gonna work this all out right here.
D1: 8.89
D2: 3.175
D3: 6.35
D4: 3.81
D5: 3.175
D6: 10.795
D7: 6.35
Dz: 7.09083
Then I realize it’s actually millimeters, so.
Dz: 70.9083, I’m gonna use 71.
So my GRD is 156.73.
And according to the book, I should seek circus employment because I’m so asymmetrical.

--
um just to remind those confused about the World Cup reference, that was written last year, this is my thoughts a year later.
I'm already on This Book Will Change Your Life Again!
why am I writing my blog this way?
...I had a reason that sometimes, I just can't remember. it's interesting though, right?

Monday, June 20, 2011

Day 60: Order an impossible pizza


Day 60
Today, I’m supposed to order an impossible pizza.
My day at work is horrendously long. There’s only a few interesting moments.
A girl who’s a walking ad for Hot Topic comes in, and one of my coworkers mentions that her look is the devil—and she’s completely serious. I just have to laugh at that.
I find a penny from 1913. That’s pretty cool.
After work, I get home and I want to sleep. But instead, I just watch some TV for a bit before calling the local pizza place and trying to do my task.
I order a pizza without cheese. This is impossible because the definition of a pizza is bread baked with tomatoes and cheese. Therefore, without the cheese, it’s not a pizza.
They actually make this, though. And it tastes good.
As I’m eating, I watch an episode of Good Eats (an awesome show) that’s all about asparagus. Alton Brown, where were you Day 17? I could’ve used this then.


--

I should try a pizza without cheese again, that really did taste good.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Day 59: Are you Psychic?


Day 59
Today, I’m supposed to use my psychic powers to levitate something.
While I’m at work, I try to levitate one of the decorative shells on the register. I don’t actually manage this, and focusing so hard on it actually makes me almost fall asleep.
The rest of my day goes pretty normally. I have a shower after work, and it wakes me up more than actually working for 8 hours did.
I go to the store, and test my luck on lottery tickets again. I lose $26.
Oh well. I’m actually pretty confident I’ll win it back anyways.
My day after that is pretty boring. I mostly watch a lot of TV.

--
I really did once have luck in the lottery. but I haven't gotten it back.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Day 58: Decide what skills to pass on in your family


Day 58
Today, I’m supposed to decide what skill I should pass on to my children.
This is assuming that I will have kids someday. I do want kids, maybe 10 years from now.
I obviously can’t begin teaching my kids a skill right now, but I’ll decide today what they’re going to learn.
I decide to teach my kids the art of devil sticks. It’s a type of juggling.
I learned it a few years ago for a theater camp play. We did Barnum, a musical based on the life of PT Barnum. At the end of the play, there’s a big circus scene, and all of us kids in the show had to learn some circus trick. I chose devil sticks (mostly ‘cause I sucked at everything else). I turned out to be not terrible at it, and I pick up my old set every so often just for fun.
I make some cupcakes (a fun hobby) with my dad, and he suggests I pass on my cooking skills to my future kids. I probably will, but c’mon, devil stick juggling is such an eccentric skill that it’ll be cool for my kids to learn it.
My day after that is kind of boring. I talk to Mike about Buffy the Vampire Slayer—he’s watching the series for the first time and I’m trying not to spoil things for him. But I am keeping a record of the completely wrong things he says. Such as “Buffy would never go for Spike” and “Glory obviously doesn’t kill her [Buffy]”.
The cupcakes come out of okay, but after making them, I feel kind of fat. I want to exercise, but I’ve got a headache.
It doesn’t help that when I mention this to my dad, he says I’m making excuses and that I am fat. And, okay, I know I really am, but it’s just not something you want other people to tell you.
I want to go for a drive, just to get out of the house, but I can’t even start the freaking car. The parking brake is stuck.
I break down crying. I seem to be doing this a lot lately. I feel completely inadequate and I just want someone to tell me it’ll be okay. But my dad’s mad at me (because I slammed the door, oh noes) and Mike’s mysteriously stopped talking. I’m alone and it hurts.
The rest of my day continues to suck.
I talk to my parents about getting some sleeping aids so that I won’t have such a screwy sleep schedule. They agree, and I’ll be getting some soon.

--

it seems like life sucks whenever I'm working.
I was fine during school, but last summer and this summer are both terrible.

Friday, June 17, 2011

Day 57: Today, try food that scares you


Day 57
Today, I’m supposed to try food that scares me.
I try a fish filet at McDonald’s. Fast food fish always kind of freaks me out. But it’s not bad, and it doesn’t kill me.
Apparently it didn’t scare me enough, because the rest of my day sucks.
I feel pushed around by managers and coworkers, and customers are bitches today. I almost completely break when one guy snidely demands for me to get a drink for him right now, but then he actually comes back later to apologize.
I’m sort of on the edge of a panic attack through the whole day, but I manage to keep it together until I leave. I drive home, singing along to the Glee soundtrack (volume 3) in the car, and I stop for gas.
A wasp flies by me and I freak out, and then I just start crying.
I feel completely worthless. I’m nothing. I’m just a person, no one special.
To all those of you who don’t pity me, who think oh she’s just crying because she’s not a special snowflake, think about this. Every single one of us has something special. You all know, somewhere deep inside, that you have or will someday make a difference and be important.
Now imagine knowing the complete opposite. Think that you will never be important, that you will pass through life without anyone caring you were here. Now you know how I feel.
Thankfully, this feeling does pass. But even though I am someone, I’m someone with a sucky life. Seriously, I work full time at McDonald’s for minimum wage and I barely get to see my friends or my boyfriend. My life sucks.
I feel better as the day goes on, but still. That was a sucky time.
I’m so tired now, but I’m enjoying just sitting here watching TV. I’m so torn right now.

--
anyone know what causes itching in hands and feet?
seriously, it's been going on a week at this point, and it bothers me.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Day 56: Rock n Roll


Day 56
Today, I’m supposed to live the rockstar life.
I kind of forgot the Book, so I can’t follow the schedule provided.
My day starts with waking up early and reading the book I bought yesterday. It was literally a I could not put it down kind of book.
Then I go to church with Mike and his family. It’s just as awkward as last time I went to church with him, but at least this time Mike is with me the whole time.
But then my rockstar life starts. We go to Mike’s friend’s graduation party.
I met this friend once, so it’s not as awkward as it could be.
We party for hours (and by party I mean we make awkward semi-sexual jokes while playing ping-pong and Wii Sports). Ariel shows up, and I haven’t seen her in about a month so we spend a bunch of time catching up, talking about Glee and reminiscing about the House class we took.
I take probably way too much cake at the party, but hey, they had three cakes and I was supposed to be all rockstar diva.
Towards the end of this party, people start heading into the pool. I don’t feel like swimming, but I put on my bathing suit top anyways pretty much because I think I look hot in it. (and judging by Mike’s looks, I think he agreed.)
Hey, I’m a rockstar today, I can wear something skimpy and think I look good.
I keep trying to get Mike’s shirt off, and other people help me by trying to get him soaked. Some of the guys almost throw him in the pool, but don’t because his phone’s in his pocket. I offhandedly mention I only want his shirt off, so they could just dip him in. Then, they actually do.
At least it gets Mike’s shirt off. I win.
I head home, rocking out to music in my car and eating junk food for dinner. I’m not sure how rockstar this is, but I’m pretty sure rockstars eat junk food and drive for long periods of time, right?
When I get home, I learn that the Tonys are on tonight. My parents recorded them for me. But honestly, I don’t really care about them anymore. I watch the performances, but I just don’t care who wins.
I’m only excited about Matthew Morrison’s performance. Wow, why doesn’t he sing like that on Glee?


--

I miss having parties like that.
Growing up sucks, you know? I can no longer just have a party with friends on a whim, it has to take planning to coordinate schedules, and it's rare that my friends and I all have a day off at the same time.
I don't like summers anymore. Too much working. they're not a break.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Day 55: Pancake Day


Day 55
Today, I’m supposed to flip the perfect pancake.
I decide to do this after work. It’d take too much time to do it for breakfast.
While I’m at work, I make plans to drive out to see Mike tonight. I so can’t wait to see him, it’s been too long.
I meet some interesting customers today—the most interesting being the one who accused me of adding up the tax wrong. I have to consider him an idiot, really. The cash register does it, and I have no control over what the tax is.
Apparently Saturdays are now “Super Saturdays” and there’s balloons everywhere. Plus we get cake.
Everyone is excited to watch the World Cup. Customers and coworkers are glued to the TV in the lobby, cheering on the US team. Personally, I don’t even know which teams are playing.
I finish work and get home to quickly pack for visiting Mike. I’m so excited!
Before I go, I make dinner for my family. It’s a breakfast for dinner, with pancakes being the main dish of course. I’m making them on a griddle, so I can’t flip them in a pan, but I do manage to flip one perfectly.
Then, I start my drive out. I stop at Target to buy a swimsuit because Mike mentioned I should bring one. While I’m there, I happen to pick up the final book of the Pretty Little Liars series. Such a good series, I can’t wait to read it.
I arrive at Mike’s house later than I expected. It’s raining pretty hard, so that slowed me down.
I’m so happy to see him. I can’t help but hug him tight and kiss him so much. I really missed him.
We spend most of the night making out before I go to bed—in a bed separate from his, of course. Don’t get any ideas.


--

Oh yeah, last year I was able to sleep in the room next to Mike's.
this year, if I visit, I'm banned to their downstairs couch which is extremely uncomfortable, and I'm not allowed to see him at all this weekend like we planned because his parents won't be home. even if I don't set foot inside his house. I'm not supposed to be in the area because oh no we might do something.
kind of hurts, now that I remember last year. apparently his parents think all we're going to do is jump in bed together, so I can't see him at all.
our work schedules collide so often that we're not going to see each other much this summer, and this is one less chance.

I don't want to say anything bad about his parents. they're really nice people. I just don't understand their thought process about this, and I really want to see Mike.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Day 54: Today count your farts


Day 54
Today, I need to count my farts.
It’s just past noon and already, 14.
This is abnormal for me. I’m sick today. So sick I had to leave work just after 3 hours of being there. Then I took a long nap and felt better (sort of).
But I’m still nauseous. And there’s some other things going on that mean I can’t be away from a toilet for too long.
I feel guilty for leaving work, though. I’ve always felt guilty skipping school, so this makes sense, it just sucks.
I feel even better now. Also, the fart count is only 16, so they’re slowing down. This is good.
(this is still embarrassing because the average for females is only 4.)
I feel better and better throughout the day, and by the time I go to bed, the count is 25.
By the time I fall asleep, though, the count is 43.
So yeah, it’s a gassy day.


--

hey, I was sick that day! don't tell me you don't fart when you're sick.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Day 53: Today, return all your junk mail


Day 53
Today, I’m supposed to send all my junk mail back to whoever sent it.
Problem is, I don’t get junk mail.
I have bad luck while I’m at work, anyways.
I’m only working 6 hours today, but they forget to give me a break. So I’m working these six hours without any food, and I have to ask if I can use the bathroom (which I find a bit embarrassing, so I wait as long as I can before I ask).
I survive, though. And when I’m leaving, I buy some food and my manager offers to provide me with free food tomorrow because they forgot my break. So I’m good.
I go to the grocery store to pick up ingredients for some cupcakes I plan to make (eventually). I also buy a lottery ticket and win $20 on it.
I don’t attribute my lottery luck to the Book, though. I really do just have amazing luck in the lottery. I have won over $250 in scratchcards, and I’ve only been playing for a bit over a year. Haven’t tried the actual lottery yet—I’m happy with my awesome luck in the scratchcards.
I have a pretty good day—until I can’t fall asleep tonight.


--

My lottery luck stopped by now.
bound to happen eventually.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Day 52: Life

Day 52
Today, I’m up at 5 to get ready for work.
I’m exhausted and I can’t really move. I’m tired all through work and the customers just seem bitchier today.
But then I get home and I can relax.
Today’s task is to find the meaning of life.
To all those fellow geeks out there reading my blog: if you are snarkily saying “well duh it’s 42” right now, WRONG. 42 is the answer to the Ultimate Question of life, it is not the meaning.
To find the meaning of life, I’m going to read the entries on Wikipedia, dictionary.com, and Urban Dictionary.
Wikipedia: “Life (cf. biota) is a characteristic that distinguishes objects that have signaling and self-sustaining processes (biology) from those that do not,[1][2] either because such functions have ceased (death), or else because they lack such functions and are classified as inanimate.[3]
Dictionary.com: “the condition that distinguishes organisms from inorganic objects and dead organisms, being manifested by growth through metabolism, reproduction, and the power of adaptation to environment through changes originating internally.”
Urban Dictionary: “A sexually-transmitted, terminal disease.”

I like that last one.
The rest of my day is boring and relaxing, but in a good way. I get to wind down and do nothing.
I talk to Mike late at night and I just break down crying because all of a sudden it hits me that I miss him. I haven’t seen him in 3 weeks, and that’s the longest we’ve gone so far without seeing each other.
I’ve been fine without him the past couple weeks, getting along fine with just talking to him every day, but today all I want to do is just see him.
I watch So You Think You Can Dance, and the girl I knew didn’t make it. I’m sad for her.

--
Okay this year, the girl did make it.
Ryan Ramirez. Vote for her.
I say this partly 'cause I used to know her, and partly because she is actually good. When she says she's been dancing for her whole life, she's not lying. She really was dancing back in elementary school when I knew her.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Day 51: Sense-less Day: Sight


Day 51
Today, I’m siupposed to be blind.
I’m typing this entry with my eyes closed. I can touch type, but I’m sure there are some mistakes here. I apologize for that, as I won’t be going back and correcting them.
I don’t really want to be blind all day. I mean, GLEE fonale is tonight.
So I make a compromise with myself and the NBook. I won’t wear my glasses (when I’m not watching Glee or any other TV. Hey, Pretty Little Liars airs tonight too and I’ve been looking forward to that). Since I am legally blind sans glasses, this should work.
So far, nopthing’s been too much of a challenge. I even managed to pout a glass of milk earlier without spilling a drop—I consider that a great accomplishment.
I start realizing walking around without my glasses is making my head hurt. I do need to stop for a while and just let my eyes rest.
That’s what sitting in front of the TV is for. I let my glasses be on then.
I take a shower and this is the only part of my day that is no differet than notmal.
I really hate this. The headache is insane.
Bujt the satellite goes out, whichI see as bad luck. So this compromise may not be enough. ‘m a bit scared about this.
I manage to make dinner. A weird pizza/ hamburger thing. I let my dad take care of all the chopping and hot stuff, so I won’t hurt nmysekf. Bujt I do a lot of the work.
I watch Hlee and OMG SO AWESOME. I cry and laugh and it’s seriously one of the best episodes ever.
Then, I try to sleep. Unfortunately, I’m so hyped on Glee that I just can’t. argh.


--

sigh.
remember when Glee was good?
Oh I still watch it, but it's not the same now.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Day 50: Make people notice you today!


Day 50
Today, I need to make people notice me.
While I’m at work, I continually tap my fingers against the register to the beat of songs stuck in my head. I’m not sure if this makes me noticeable.
Work is extremely slow today. I’m so bored.
After work, I drive home with my music blaring and my windows rolled down. Also, I’m loudly singing along for everyone to hear. I think some people do notice me.
Also, I go to the post office to collect mail from our box, and I’m still in my McDonald’s uniform. This is noticeable.
However, in the mail is a package. A CD. It’s one I’ve been waiting for, The Young Veins’ “Take A Vacation”. I used to be seriously obsessed with Panic At the Disco, so of course I would love the music from this group. (I don’t feel like explaining that. If you know Panic/TYV, you get it. If you don’t know them, listen to their music.)
The CD is fantastic and makes my day a bit better.
Later in the day, I go with my dad to Boston to film a concert. I’m used to filming things with him, but I’ve never done it after already working for 7 hours.
The performance is something called Chekov Triptych. It’s three stories of Anton Chekov’s read aloud with musical accompaniment. It’s an interesting concept, but it sucks. So bad.
I’m literally falling asleep as I’m filming it, but I hope that it came out okay.
So, my day kind of sucks, but I really did try to stand out today.


--

I remember that concert, and how terribly boring it was.
It was just. long.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Day 49: Make a citizen's arrest!


Day 49
Today, I’m supposed to make a citizen’s arrest.
I spend most of the day shopping. I’m blowing my whole paycheck.
I buy some clothes, the next Glee soundtrack, and $100 worth of books. I like books.
I don’t make a citizen’s arrest, so when I get home, I jokingly tell my dad he’s under arrest for doing construction on our house without a permit. He’s installing some lights in the family room.

--
I do feel bad that today's post was short and uninteresting and they continue to be that way for a while.
The job tired me out at first too much to really write anything.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Day 48: Hello!


Day 48
Today, I’m supposed to have a complete stranger write down their first impression of me.
I meet many strangers, unfortunately, all while I’m working.
I kind of try to sense what they think of me. I’m pretty sure I come off as a nice person, if a little nervous sometimes.
I meet some new co-workers today too.
There’s this one kid, younger than me but acts like he’s superior to me in every way. He annoys me to no end.
Towards the end of my shift, about 22 people come in at once and I happen to be the only one on register. Luckily, I don’t screw up a lot, and people seem to be very understanding. (except for one bitchy woman.)
I can’t actually do my task today, as after work, I don’t go anywhere and I can’t meet a stranger. The day hasn’t been so bad, except for the little panic attack I had with the 22 people.
I have a weird dream tonight. I dream of a Jamba Juice opening near my house. (Since moving from California, the one thing I’ve missed most is Jamba Juice. Delicious smoothies are always good.) In the dream, this Jamba explodes. And kills my boyfriend. The sad part is, I still really want one to open here.


--

I remember that snotty little kid.
I remember, unimportant as it seemed at the time, I had that 22 person line because he was supposed to be on register with me and he was joking with one of the kitchen people instead. She was working while joking, he wasn't.
He ended up getting fired. His mom had apparently been pulling him out of work, and she was the one telling our boss about it, not him.
Seriously, at some point, mommy can't do it for you.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Day 47: Tonight count sheep and cure insomnia


Day 47
Today, I’m supposed to count sheep tonight when I fall asleep.
Easy. Okay.
I’m so dragging this morning. I’m so tired.
McDonald’s recalls some Shrek glassware we’ve been selling. Of course, we don’t get told what to do about it. Not many customers even care, really.
We’re told to heavily promote the new frappes. I sell 6 in my last two hours and this makes me happy. Then I realize that my life sucks if that actually makes me happy.
I go home and I’m exhausted. Graduation at the local high school is tonight, and I was gonna go since a bunch of my friends are graduating, but I’m so tired.
I am happy for them, congrats to them, all that, but I will fall asleep there, seriously. I’ll go to their parties, but I’ll leave the actual ceremony to their families.
I get ice cream, come back, put it in the basement. 20 minutes later, I go down to the basement and the TV is on. It wasn’t on 20 minutes ago and no one has gone down there, so I’m a little freaked out.
I try counting sheep as I go to sleep tonight, but I get so bored with it after a little while. Then, of course, I can’t fall asleep.

--
I forgot about the Shrek glasses. We haven't done anything like that since then. Maybe the lead paint was a mistake.
To be fair to McDonald's, it's not like they let a lot of people get poisoned.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Day 46: Birthday Day!


Day 46
I’ve realized my entries are getting shorter. Working makes it hard to write long passages on my day.
Today, I’m supposed to write down my friends’ birthdays.
The day starts way too early again. I’m having trouble concentrating for the first few hours at work.
Things get better, but then they get worse.
I accidentally tell a guy the wrong price for chicken nuggets. The price isn’t on the menu, so I’m only guessing.
He completely goes insane and starts shouting at me. He calls me an idiot and threatens to call McDonald’s headquarters.
Now I really don’t think they’re going to care much about a misstated price. But still, him calling me an idiot makes me want to cry. It’s been a long and hard day.
I stay an extra hour, and when I get home, my feet hurt so bad. I’m dead tired.
So, friends’ birthdays.
I only know 2 off the top of my head. Mike’s and Stephanie’s. Boyfriend and best friend. Those really are the two most important.
I stalk other people on Facebook to figure out everyone else’s birthday.
I watch last night’s So You Think You Can Dance. It’s a cool show, I’ve watched the last few seasons.
One of the girls who goes to Vegas, Ryan, looks so familiar to me. She’s from Morgan Hill, where I went to elementary and middle school. When they show pictures of her as a little kid, I remember her.
We went to the same school. We were in a few plays together. In our summer production of Annie, she played Annie and I played Molly. I remember we got along pretty well, but we weren’t quite friends. I have absolutely no contact with her now, I just remember her a little bit.
Still, it’s pretty cool to see someone I kind of know on TV. I will definitely be voting for her.


--

Last year, Ryan didn't make it to the finals, but I'm watching again this year.
If she does make it, vote for her!

Day 45: Romance Day


Day 45
Today, I’m supposed to come up with a romantic compliment that’s never been said before.
Today starts out badly. I wake up at 4:57 and I’m so tired.
I get to work, and the day drags on. I’m so bored.
I get home, and I really want a nap. But I don’t take one.
I basically do nothing all afternoon.
Then, 20 minutes before I go to bed, I’m just now remembering I never did come up with that compliment. So, I’m gonna send off a quick text to Mike.
“you are the sexiest geek there is. also you make a really hot Doctor. I love you. <3”

--

Forgot about this blog yesterday. was up from dawn till midnight. so, double post today.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

Day 44: Defy superstition


Day 44
Today, I’m supposed to defy superstition.
I’m very superstitious, so this could be hard for me. On the other hand, I do already know many many many superstitions.
I don’t really defy any superstitions in the morning, but my day at work goes okay anyways.
An old man gives me some hard butterscotch candies. I can’t get tips working at McDonald’s, but this is close enough and it makes me happy.
Another old man tells me I’m good-looking. I’m pretty sure my face looks exactly like :D.
I finally learn how to make coffee! I don’t drink coffee, but now I can make it awesome for other people.
On my way home, I’m singing in the car. I declare the car to be my stage, then, to break superstition, I shout out, “MACBETH.” The car doesn’t immediately break down, but I’m still spooked.
I get home, and after some time relaxing, I have dinner.
My mom calls, I tell her I’ve already eaten, she gets mad because she’s been planning dinner.
I know she’s pissed off, and I’m scared that she’s going to yell at me.
But, it all gets resolved and we’re fine.
Then my dog poos on the floor and I have to pick it up.
And I just remembered there is a new Glee on tonight, this makes everything SO MUCH BETTER.
Glee is awesome.
But then after it’s over, I have to try to sleep. And I can’t sleep. I’m lying there awake for hours before I do finally sleep.


--

I still have those butterscotch candies sitting in my room.
No, definitely not planning on eating them. I'm not so much a fan of butterscotch.
I just keep them to remind myself not everything about this job sucks.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Day 43: This evening, write a proper diary account of your day.


Day 43
Today, I’m supposed to write a diary account of my day.
So I’ll be waiting till late tonight and actually write it in past tense, ooh.
Woke up at 7:30, to a song on my iPod I did not recognize.
Watched some TV for a while, had breakfast. Corn Pops.
Went to the store to cash in a $20 winning ticket. Also bought my lunch there.
Played a game on the Wii for a while, some cooking thing.
Hung out with Lainie and Zack and Jessie. It’s Lainie’s birthday, so I gave her a dollar and bought her a lottery ticket. She lost.
We watched Anastasia. I mentioned I was really missing Mike, and Jessie texted him to get him to talk to me. It worked.
Then I came home, watched some more TV before bed.


--

I hate summer away from Mike.
this time, he will talk to me, when he has the time. he rarely has the time.

he hasn't said "I love you" in over a week. he used to tell me that daily. it really hurts, but I don't know what to tell him about it without sounding whiny and clingy. we already had a fight about that, I don't want to start another.
while I'm on the subject of complaining, my boss sucks and I won't know till late tonight if I have Sunday off. Therefore, I won't be able to make weekend plans till about 10pm tonight.

My life was good a year ago today apparently. Now I have no friends, no Mike, and probably no job if this crazy scheduling continues. I don't know if I can handle it.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Day 42: Today walk barefoot on grass


Day 42
Today, all I need to do is walk barefoot through the grass.
Couldn’t’ve picked a more perfect day for this. It’s nice weather, I don’t have to work so this is literally all I need to do today.
Of course, I do have some plans. I’m gonna make cupcakes.
I go to the store, get cupcake ingredients, bake the cupcakes.
While they’re baking, I head out to the backyard to walk barefoot in the grass.
A mosquito bites me. I don’t like grass too much—actually I’m allergic to some kinds. Luckily not this kind.
I make the cupcakes, they come out well.
Pretty much, it’s been a boring day. Nothing has happened, really.


--

Yeah, this day was so boring I don't remember it.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Day 41: Apply for a knighthood


Day 41
Today, I’m supposed to apply for knighthood.
Okay, I might do this. I know it won’t be possible.
There’s a Doctor Who marathon today, so at least I can feel kind of British (not really close, I know).
I look up how to apply for knighthood, and no, it’s not possible. I’m American, I’ve done nothing special, I don’t qualify.
I go out with my parents for a while. They say it’ll be for a couple of hours, it lasts way longer than that.
I get new shoes, so maybe my feet won’t hurt too bad next week. I also get a cool little eraser, one of those Japanese ones, to start my collection. It’s little French fries.
Then I spend a few more hours with my parents buying food and things at the hardware store. My foot begins to swell again, and it gets to the point where I just can’t walk.
But taking off my shoes for the drive home does help. I’m now fine.
My mom suggests for the knighthood, I join the SCA. Society for Creative Anachronism—they run a bunch of Renaissance faires and things. I went to some of their faires when I was little.
I look up local chapters, and I’m really not impressed. There’s not much I can do while being a full-time student without a car. So I decide it’s not worth the $35 to be a member. (yet.)
My swollen feet area already bad luck for today. Not doing today’s task won’t really make it that much worse, I hope.
I watch Chocolat with my parents, and it’s really making me crave chocolate. I have some chocolate ice cream, but it’s just not the same.
Also, it’s a good movie.


--

This time, I haven't changed much.
I still collect those erasers, and I still want to be British.
If I was British, I would've seen the latest Doctor Who already.