Day 1: Warm-Up

My name is Stephanie Rachel Mann.

My prettiest toe is on my left foot, the one next to my big toe.

There. I’ve completed today’s task. Two of them, actually.

Yesterday I picked up a book, This Book Will Change Your Life. I’m sort of in a rut right now, so it looked interesting. It has little tasks for me to do each day. Doesn’t seem that life-changing, but who knows? Can’t hurt to try it.

As you read this, you should know that I am writing this on April 19, 2010. You will not be able to read this until April 19, 2011. Why am I waiting a year? Simple. I want to finish the book first.

Today’s task is to pick one small task from a short list. I decide to overachieve and try to do them all.

I’m sitting in my boyfriend’s house this morning. I’d slept over the night before. (on the couch, not with him.) I pick up the book and glance over the tasks, and then inform my boyfriend’s little sister that my middle name is Rachel.

“Tell someone your middle name.” Check.

I head out for the day with Mike (the boyfriend). We’re going to hike up a nearby mountain. As he drives, I read the list aloud to him. Most of them, I plan to do during the hike.

I tell Mike which of my toes is the prettiest.

“Decide which one of your toes is the prettiest.” Check.

Mike suggests I name my breasts ‘Peaky’, and then comments that’s more of a description. I hit him.

“Give your genitalia pet names.” Check, kind of.

I then go on a short hunger strike, and jokingly tell Mike that I am striking because of health care and the economy and orphans in Africa. The minute passes quickly.

“Go on a one-minute hunger strike.” Check.

I then decide to go on a one-minute Fox News boycott because of their crazy lies. At the end of this boycott, Mike and I discuss Glenn Beck’s insanity.

We arrive at the park to start the hike. It seems easy at first, a fun, relaxed hike. We stop every few yards to kiss each other, because we’re a young couple in love, and that’s what young couples in love do.

People pass by us, and Mike reminds me I’m supposed to say “Yo” to someone. I joke that I’m too white to say that, and I really am. I’m a German-Scottish girl with blonde hair and skin so pale you can see my veins through it. I don’t say “Yo”.

But I say it, quietly, to the next person that passes.

“Say ‘yo’ instead of ‘hello’.” Check.

Mike and I pause at a tree, and I see a spiderweb. I tell it, “You’re a stupid spider.”

“Insult an insect.” Semi-check—a spider is an arachnid, as I tell Mike. He tells me I’m not done.

So when a fly buzzes past my head, I tell it that it’s lame.

We reach the top of a hill, and the trail keeps going. We go up three more hills before finally arriving at the top.

The view is worth it. I can see my school, miles away. I can even see my dorm.

Mike and I have a little picnic lunch up there, a little making out on the picnic blanket, and then we head back.

Going back is so much faster. It’s mostly downhill.

But then, my ankle locks up.

I’ve had a bad ankle for years. I don’t know what I did to screw it up, but I do know that every so often, it will lock and I can’t bend it.

Mike leads me to sit down on a fallen tree, and like a good boyfriend is supposed to, he massages my ankle. It feels better after a few minutes, and we are able to return to the car.

He drives me back to my dorm, with a stop at the grocery store on the way. We’re going to make cupcakes.

He makes fun of me for being excited about the self-scanners at Stop & Shop, but then he uses one and is fascinated by it.

We return to my dorm, make delicious chocolatey cupcakes, and then we leave them to cool while we rush back out to see a movie: Kick-Ass.

That movie definitely lives up to its name.

We get some pizza after the movie, and as we walk out to the car, we start joking.

“I am going to marry this pizza,” I announce. “Sorry, Mike, I need to dump you so I can marry it.”

He laughs, and I continue, “But don’t worry. Eventually it’s going to leave me for some two-bit calzone tramp, and then I’ll go back to you.”

We continue joking about my torrid love affair with the pizza, then finally I announce, “I need to eat this before I fall in love with it. I’m hungry.”

We finish the entire pizza before we’ve even gotten back to my dorm. It’s a good pizza.

I won’t tell you what we do at my dorm. You can probably figure it out. (Hint: it doesn’t involve those cupcakes from before. We ignore those.)

----------

My thoughts today:

Okay, so that wasn't exactly a year ago, but pretty close. Why the discrepancy? you'll see later.

Anyways, yeah. I don't remember what exactly compelled me to publish my notes a full year later, but it's too late now to go back and change that. So, enjoy this. Enjoy reading about my exploits with the book over the past year.

Oh, and please tell your friends. I'm pretty sure right now I have two readers, and they're my best friend and my boyfriend. (and if you two aren't even reading? I fail.)

I remember this day. Pretty vividly. Probably because I wrote about it so well. (that'll change. posts get way short.)

Also, that toe is still the prettiest.