Monday, November 14, 2011

Jour 207: Write a philosophy


Jour 207
Aujord’hui, je dois ecrit mon philosophé.
I think that’s right, I’m not looking up anything in my French-English dictionary.
Anyways, I don’t have a philosophy. Nor is there time to sit in a café and write one. So I decide instead to sit on the bus on the way to Mike’s house later and write my story.
Turns out there’s no light on in the bus, and it’s night, so I type my story on my iPod. It’s difficult, but I manage.


--

writing is fun!

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Jour 206: Public Argument


Jour 206
Oui, France est pour une semaine.
So today I have to be French too. I’m supposed to have a big public argument.
I make some cupcakes today, because I’m going to a party for some little girls I know. Some people from Mike’s church, their twin daughters, it’s their first birthday. It’s hard to describe my relationship to this family—they’re not quite friends, and I don’t go to their church, but I’ve met them a bunch of times while hanging out with Mike. The girls are absolutely adorable, too.
At the party, Mike is being very clingy and touchy. So I fulfill the public fight requirement by continuing to push him away, even though I love him touching me.
C’est bon.


--

No comments from today.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Jour 205: French week


Jour 205
Aujord’hui, je dois aller au France.
Except, I can’t go to France just ‘cause the book tells me to. It’s NaNoWriMo, it’s the middle of midterms, Thanksgiving’s coming soon, it’s just a bad time to go to France. Even if I could afford it. Sigh.
But good thing je parle français! I can pretend I’m in France.
My roommate wakes up at about 5 this morning. It’s Saturday. Bleh.
I try to eat French food for lunch today, but there really isn’t much of a choice of food in the dining commons. Lucky me though, they have croissants, which are not only French but I also love them. Yum.
I wish I could go to France. I love France. The country is beautiful, the history is fascinating, and the art and the music and the language are all just amazing. Plus, French food is the best in the world.


--

Any of my loyal readers (all 2 of you) want to give me money to go to France?

Friday, November 11, 2011

Day 204: Be serious [and NaNo]


Day 204
Today, I need to be as serious as possible.
I try to do this, try to take everything Mike says at face value, but I just keep forgetting. Plus, I’m too sarcastic a person.
It’s been a long, Mike-filled day.
Also, I reached 25,000 words for my novel today, so I’m awesome. I’m halfway done with the book before I’m halfway done with the month.


--

I'm not at 25k yet. I'm not even at 20k. I'm behind!
(well not really, I'm on track for the schedule I set for myself this month)

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Day 203: Pyramid scheme


Day 203
Today, I’m supposed to participate in a pyramid scheme, but since that’s illegal, I won’t.
I hang out with Mike, and I need to buy new pants. But the first place we go, nothing fits.
I start crying. I hate feeling fat.
I tell Mike that I’m going to stop eating. I’m completely serious about this when I say it. I don’t want to be fat anymore. I don’t want to turn into one of those people so obese that I need a wheelchair to get around. I’m upset.
It’s at this time I also tell Mike that I was scared he might cheat on me yesterday. This is big and dramatic and if it was a movie there would be kissing and dramatic music followed by a cut to a scene showing it’s all okay.
There was kissing, and it was all okay because I managed to find pants later, but no dramatic music.
And that’s pretty much the high point of my day.


--

I'm really sick today.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Day 202: Take a pregnancy test


Day 202
Today, I’m supposed to take a pregnancy test.
I’m on my period. I’m not pregnant.
I go to classes, classes are too long, then I go to a meeting for the cooking show I auditioned for a while ago. I didn’t get the host position, but I’ll be helping with the production crew. I’m going to help come up with ideas, then I get to be the one to test the recipes.
Fun times.
Later, Mike texts me that he’s with a friend of his who’s breaking up with her boyfriend. I don’t like this. I’ve never met this girl and Mike’s told me that he used to have a crush on her. And he’s going to be the one comforting her after a breakup?
I don’t want to be a jealous girlfriend, but honestly, I’m scared. I know, if I think about it, that all he’s doing is being a good friend to her. I know he has female friends and I’ve never been jealous before.
But something about this just makes me nervous. I can’t be logical when I imagine this girl is going to turn to Mike on the rebound and he’s going to go back to his old crush on her and forget all about me.
I’m texting him and I’m not telling him what I’m scared of. I’m not going to tell him. I know next year when I finally publish this he’ll read it and go “oh i’m so sorry” and I’ll be all “oh it’s okay” and it will be okay then. But right now, it isn’t.


--

And now, a year later, it is okay.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Day 201: Be an artist


Day 201
Today, I’m supposed to be a contemporary artist. So I draw a smiley face on a table in the dining commons.
I’m not an artist. I have a message, and it’s coming through my stories, not through art.
Also, I watch Glee tonight and it makes me cry.


--

I can't remember exactly but I think that Glee was the one where Kurt's dad had a heart attack.
who didn't cry at that one?